The Last Wish List of a Black Man

If you are reading this, it is only because I have left you. 

The gods have called me to rest with those 

Who have come before me and those who will come after. 

I put down a few things to read but hopefully, you hear them in my voice.

Hopefully, you read them with the deepness and clarity of my words. 

And apply my wishes with both my care and confidence. 

This has been on my mind and I know how I’d like to be laid to rest. 

The only conclusion I’ve come to is that I would not like to be buried. 

Though the earth is where things always begin, 

It is not the place where things should end since eternity is very long and I do not wish to be dirt Longer than I have to.

Also…have you ever paid for a casket? 

You know I would be forever mad if you covered something so beautiful in dirt. 

I once learned that people can be turned into trees and,

I think I’d like that. My only responsibility would be 

To grow and give support to those who seek shade from the sun 

Or to carve their initials with their lover to mark that they existed at one point. 

You could sit underneath me, and the generations who come after me 

Can slip into a dreamy sleep while listening to wind blow through my leaves,

Sit and lean against my trunk while lost in a book, 

Always relaxing and learning to enjoy the small parts of life, 

Even though there is plenty to stress about. That’s a hard yet vital lesson to learn. 

I’m also curious about being cremated. I wonder if I’d like that too. 

But if you do, make sure to free my ashes, I have no interest in being bound. 

Whether it be by the chains of my ancestors, 

The suffocating confidant of a coffin, 

Or any sort of container that’ll restrict me from being free

Forcing me to serve as an antique or artifact on 

Display in your living room museum. 

But I also think it’ll give you the chance to remember me 

By allowing yourself to say goodbye. 

Return to the place you let me roam free whenever you need someone to listen to you. 

Even if you can’t see me, I’ll always be there, listening.

In short, I’m trying to say that I’ll leave it up to you. 

I’ll let you decide how I can best remain in your life

When you can no longer see, touch, taste, hear, or smell me anymore. 

When I die please do not tell me to rest in power, 

Please let me rest in whatever way I see fit because 

I am tired of needing to be strong. 

This is a non-negotiable. I theorize that my charge to be strong

Only took things away from me and sent me to my grave faster than expected. 

No need to tell me otherwise. I’m dead and how would telling me I’m wrong serve you?

Let me reason with my fate in my own mind because there is no real answer. 

Remember to make mistakes. You will learn more that way. 

I promise you winning isn’t all it seems to be. 

No one really realizes that failure is sometimes the best teacher. 

So...be okay with being wrong. 

Promise me you’ll enjoy and love being alive. 

I imagine it’s nothing compared to what I’m going to be part of 

While I’m here, but there are things I want to feel again. 

I wish I could breathe with you and feel your breath against mine. 

To be blessed with the smell of my loved ones when I hug them tightly. 

I wish I could write again. There are so many stories I want to tell, 

So many things I want to express. 

I wish I could laugh more. I feel like I didn’t laugh with everyone enough. 

But I wish for things that cannot happen, so I charge you 

To grant the wishes I’ve provided you. 

While I am no longer there, I plan to thank all of my ancestors

And charge all of those who I’ll serve as an ancestor 

To breathe in the energy of life and enjoy every second of it. 

Besides that, I think I’ll finally relax while I’m here. 

I worried too much when I was there. 

So much that matters to us ends up not mattering at all. 

So make sure you take time to recognize time. 

Take a moment to love where you are, 

Take in the gift of the now, and don’t worry about what will happen in the future 

Simply allow what is to come, to come. Don’t chase it. 

I don’t want you to waste your time the way I did. 

If you do, you’ll be out of time like me. Life is only temporary. 

Our breath turns the gears of a temporary clock 

Every time your lungs fill they have the equal opportunity not to. 

Tomorrow is equal opportunity. 

Give love. Give laughter. Give joy. Slow down. Enjoy. 

It’s okay to miss me. Trust me, I’ll miss you twice as much. 

Sincerely, 

Me. 

P.S….I have one last wish. Laugh for me. 

I definitely didn’t laugh enough when I was there.